Chapter 50: Innsanity (50)
Blug!
Min collapsed to the floor, face going green.
Ahrie spotted him and shouted, "Oii, you good?" then hustled over to help.
Min looked up, wild-eyed. He lurched, grabbed Ahrie by the collar with both hands like he was hanging on for dear life—then—Ughhhk!—he puked straight into Ahrie’s face.
"You son of a biiiiit—" Min gagged.
"Ughhhk!"
Ahrie went full pissed. "FUCK OFF! GET OFF, YOU STUPID SHIT!" he snarled and shoved.
Min clung on like glue. Ahrie shoved harder—cloth strained, seams popped, and Ahrie’s shirt tore under the grip. He cursed, yanked, hissed.
Enough. Ahrie delivered one clean, controlled chop to Min’s neck—no gore, just the sort of smack that drops someone cold. Min’s eyes fluttered, his grip slackened, and he crumpled, out like a cut lamp.
Ahrie stood over him, breath heavy, shirt ruined, hands shaking a little from the aftershock. "Geez," he muttered, wiping puke off his sleeve.
Ahrie sighed, picked up Min’s knife and shield, then grabbed the idiot by the ankle and started dragging him through town—like a sack of potatoes.
His shirt was ripped open, hair messy, still smeared with whatever unholy leftovers Min had expelled. But Ahrie didn’t care.
To his left—someone fighting a monster in the middle of the street.
To his right—someone casually eating noodles while that same monster flew past.
A blown-up bakery had already rebuilt half its counter and was selling again under a plank roof. the owner hammering nails while yelling, "Discount! Fifty percent off if it’s slightly burnt!"
Ahrie just walked through it all, unbothered, Min’s body bumping behind him.
He paused in front of a shop selling shirts and random gear. Looked down at his torn clothes.
"...Yeah, nah."
He stepped inside, bought a fresh set, changed right there like it was nothing, then went right back to dragging Min through the dirt, humming faintly as if this was just another normal day.
Ahrie burst through the inn doors, dragging Min
"Welcome to the best inn arou—uhh... what happened to that sir?" the receptionist asked, pointing at Min’s limp body.
"Drunk," Ahrie replied flatly.
"Owk...aay... how many rooms?"
"Two."
Ahrie tossed some coins on the counter, and the receptionist led them upstairs. "These are your rooms. They’re right next to each other."
"Cool."
Ahrie shoved the door open, hauled Min inside, and dropped him face-first onto the bed.
"Well then, if you need anything—"
"Yeah, yeah, thanks," Ahrie cut her off as she closed the door behind her.
He stared at Min’s unmoving body. "Yooo... Min. I’m next door if you need me..."
Silence.
No twitch. No snoring. No damn breathing.
"Min...?"
Ahrie slapped his face. Once. Twice. Then panic started creeping up.
He grabbed his hair, eyes wide. "No way. I didn’t kill him, right? Bro, don’t do this to me—"
Then—click. His brain finally rebooted.
"Wait—HAHA, I can heal!" He smacked his forehead, annoyed at himself.
Ahrie raised his glowing hand, light pulsing from his palm.
At the same time, the receptionist—who had turned back down the hall—murmured,
"Oww, I should probably remind them dinner’s free tonight..."
She reached for the doorknob.
Inside, Ahrie shouted—
[P.A.I.N.]
His fist shot downward.
Min tilted his head just in time—the punch missed by an inch, cracking the bedpost instead.
"Gotcha, bitch!" Min suddenly laughed, grinning.
BAM!
Ahrie headbutted him mid-sentence.
"FUCK OFF!" Ahrie yelled, clutching his own forehead as Min rolled away laughing.
The door creaked open.
"Excuse me, sir—you can eat for free at the dining are—"
The receptionist froze mid-sentence.
Ahrie and Min’s faces were inches apart.
"Oho~ what is this?" she gasped, covering her mouth with a mischievous smile.
Both Ahrie and Min instantly shoved each other away.
"Oi! Hold up, it’s not—"
"We’re not—"
They both tried to explain at the same time.
But the receptionist just nodded knowingly. "No, no, it’s okay. You don’t need to hide it."
"WHAT—?"
"I totally get it. I’ll just... leave you two alone, hm?" She winked and started walking away.
"Wait, no—listen—" Ahrie called out, following her.
"It’s not what you think!" Min added, jogging beside him.
The receptionist giggled all the way down the stairs. "It’s fine! I support you guys. Love is love!"
"WE’RE INTO GIRLS!" both shouted in unison, voices echoing through the hall.
"Sure, sure," she said with that same smug smile.
Eventually, somehow, they ended up sitting awkwardly at the dining area—eating in silence while the receptionist smiled proudly from the counter.
The night went on. Drunk laughter, clinking cups, the usual chaos of Embergarde...
Then—
BOOOOM!
Another explosion tore through the distance.
Ahrie snored. Min drooled. Neither moved an inch.
They must’ve been too damn tired.
When morning came—
The inn was half-destroyed. The ceiling was cracked, smoke rose from the street, and the walls looked like they’d survived a siege.
Ahrie sat up, eyes half-open. "Da... fuck happened?"
Some Glimmerfen seekers came looking for Ahrie and Min.
"Ohh, there you are," one of them said. "We’re heading back to Glimmerfen. Everyone’s gathering in the middle of town—renting carriages for the trip."
Ahrie and Min exchanged a look, shrugged, and followed along.
When they arrived at the town square, the place was already buzzing.
Akayra stood off to the side—quiet as always, her eyes scanning the scene without saying a word.
Local seekers from Embergarde were gathering too, checking gear, patching wounds
Among the crowd, a high-ranking official from Embergarde approached. Behind him stood the leader of one of the guilds that operated in town—well-dressed, with that
"important guy" aura everyone hated.
"I see you’re leaving already," the official said, clasping hands with the Glimmerfen group’s leader. "You did well out there."
He gestured to the attendants beside him. They brought forward sacks and boxes—filled with food, medicines, and other essentials.
"Here. From Embergarde. For your people."
The Glimmerfen leader nodded. "Appreciated."
"Thank you very much," said the one leading the Glimmerfen group, bowing slightly.
"Hope you all return safely," the high-ranking official replied with a polite smile. "We’ll have a big surprise waiting for you—as thanks for helping us solve our little... issue."
With that, the official and his entourage turned and left, boots clicking against the cobblestone.
Soon after, the Glimmerfen leader finished renting the carriages, and everyone began boarding. The wheels creaked, horses neighed, and slowly, the convoy started to roll out of Embergarde.
After a few kilometers past the gate, someone turned around to take one last look. One by one, they all did the same—staring at the city that had nearly broken them.
"What kind of surprise do you think he meant?" one seeker muttered, resting his chin on the carriage’s window.
Before anyone could answer—
A flash.
A blinding, violent flicker of light tore through the skyline.
Then—BOOOOM!
A series of explosions thundered through the air. The ground trembled. Clouds of smoke rose high, swallowing half of Embergarde in fire and dust.
Everyone in the carriages froze, eyes wide, faces pale.
They could see them... silhouettes of people on top of the city walls—waving. Smiling.
"...Fucking lunatics," one of the seekers muttered.
Then, somehow—
They all started laughing.
After a week of traveling, they finally made it back.
Ahrie headed straight to the Healer’s Office—Dane’s office, specifically.
"Sit down," Dane said, leaning back in his chair. "So... how was the job?"
"Exhausting as fuck," Ahrie muttered, dropping into the seat.
"I heard you made them all unconscious," Dane grinned. "Ahh, I wish I’d seen that sight."
"This guy’s got a screw loose too..." Ahrie mumbled under his breath.
"Anyway," Dane said, rummaging through his drawer. "Here’s your bronze coins."
BLAAG!
The heavy pouch of bronze coins hit the desk.
"And here’s Min’s," Dane added, sliding another pouch over.
Ahrie grabbed both and headed out.
Outside the Seeker’s Hall, Min was already waiting.
Ahrie tossed him his share.
Both stared at the glittering pouches in their hands—then looked at each other.
"We’re rich," Ahrie grinned.
"We’re rich!" Min repeated, jumping.
At long last, they could finally afford a carriage.
"We’re gonna buy a CARRIAGE! LET’S GOOOO!" Min shouted, hyped as hell.
"And a new hors—"
NEIIIGH!
Both froze.
Their smiles dropped instantly.
Standing there, covered in dirt, ribs showing, was their old, miserable-looking horse—faithfully waiting for them the whole time.
Ahrie sighed. "...You’ve gotta be kidding me."
Min groaned. "We can’t just ditch him, can we?"
The horse blinked.
Ahrie smacked the horse’s head.
"Da hell happened to you?"
The slim horse neighed weakly, dirt falling off its mane.
Ahrie and Min sighed, scratching their heads in sync.
"Come on," Ahrie said. "Let’s get you something to eat before you drop dead."
They stopped by a nearby street vendor, grabbed a few snacks, and headed to the park.
They sat down in the grassy area, two idiots and a horse, sharing food like it was some kind of reunion picnic....
"So basically," Ahrie said between bites, "you slept in the carriage this whole time? Are you that dumb?"
The horse just blinked.
They ate until their stomachs were full and their brains half-dead from laughter.
"Carriage?" Min asked, wiping his mouth.
"Of course." Ahrie smirked.
They dapped hands, grinning wide—
Until the slim horse slowly shook its head.
"No?" Ahrie’s smile froze.
Min’s eyes twitched.
Ahrie and Min turned toward it, menacingly silent.
Minutes later—
The horse’s legs were tied with rope, dangling over a ditch.
"Last chance, you’ll pull the carriage or nah?" Ahrie said flatly.
The horse trembled, eyes wide. Finally, it nodded.
A single tear slid down its muzzle.
I’m fucked...