Chapter 49: I Need To Speak With Elien
Elián;
I stare at the clear blue sky above us as my mind wanders.
My mind is blank. No. It’s not blank. There are just too many thoughts currently running through my head; I can’t zero in on one.
Lioran’s words keep replaying in my mind as well as Elien’s memories.
I’ve had quite a number of flashbacks. And still, I know close to nothing about Elien’s past.
There are so many contradictions.
I was told I appeared out of the blue. Koda said they tried to find Elien’s family or friends and found no one.
I can understand the family part, though. Elien’s father kicked him out.
But friends? Is it possible that Elien made no friends all his life??
And it seems like he dated Lioran in the past. How? When? Why? How did they meet?
And Lioran kept saying Elien vanished. Where did Elien go? Why did he leave?
As if trying to survive this place wasn’t enough trouble, now I have to deal with the three-day ultimatum Lioran gave me. What do I do??
He’s asking me to leave. Like, I know any other fucking place to go!
Do I talk to Koda?
Ugh! I hate this!! How do I go about this?!
I kiss my teeth in annoyance, and Alana, who’s lying on the grass beside me, finally speaks.
"Want to talk about it?"
I turn to her, and her observant brown eyes stare at me.
"You’ve been sulking since the library. Did Alpha Lioran say something to you?" She adds, and I take a deep breath.
I stare at her for a few seconds as I try to find sensible ways to put forth my worries, but nothing comes.
I sigh in surrender and turn back to the sky. The silence stretches, and finally, I speak.
"What’s Alpha Lioran’s love life like?"
She sits up to look at me, and when I look at her, there’s curiosity in her eyes. She stares at me for a few seconds before looking away, and hugging her knees to her chest as she stares p at the sky.
"To be honest, no one knows much about Alpha Lioran. He’s like a poem. A very mysterious, deep poem that needs adequate studying to understand." She speaks, and I push myself into a sitting position as I listen to her.
I imitate her posture, but rest my cheek against my knee as I look at her.
"Alpha Lioran hardly speaks. Given that all the Alphas spent their formative years in their different clans, their relationship with each other isn’t exactly smooth. The most distant, however, is Alpha Lioran. Even Alpha Rhydian has managed to form some kind of bond with Alpha Koda, but Alpha Lioran... He always keeps to himself." She continues, and although this doesn’t answer my question about his love life, I listen silently because at least I get to learn some things about him, and maybe I’ll learn something that can help me.
"To our knowledge, Alpha Lioran has never dated anyone before." She says as she finally looks at me, and I raise a brow.
"Alpha Koda once dated a Beta, Alpha Rhydian doesn’t put tags on his... affairs, and Alpha Zether and Zephan weave through brothels like rivers flow from seas... But Alpha Lioran has never had a relationship scandal." She explains, and I pause.
A lot of questions pop up in my head, but I struggle to push them back. My attention right now should be on absorbing as much information as possible about Lioran... not building curiosity about the other Alphas’ love lives.
"Two years ago, though, things changed drastically." She says like she just remembered something joyful and beautiful, and I raise a brow as I listen.
"Alpha Lioran changed. He was always smiling. He seemed so happy. He had this bounce to his step and even used to greet the palace workers as he walked by. He used to let his hair down and started trying different colour outfits other than his usual blue ones. It was indeed a sight to behold. We could tell he was happy. We didn’t know why... But my guess is that he was in love. This side of him lasted a few months, and then suddenly... it stopped." She narrates, and my heart falls.
I feel something cold and ugly twist in my chest, and as her words sink in, this heavy guilt begins to gnaw at me. Like it is my fault.
"He lost his smile. Stopped letting down his hair... went back to wearing only blue... Hardly ever left his room... The few times we caught glimpses of him; he looked like he cried through the nights. Whatever made him so happy... showed him true pain too. Anyone can tell that he grew colder than he ever was. More withdrawn. More silent... more prone to anger. I wish I could find whoever hurt him like that. No one deserves to be robbed of their joy like that. If you ask me, I think it would have been better if he had never met the person who broke him like that..."
I can see the annoyance and anger on her face as she speaks, but by now, my chest is heavy. It feels like a brick just materialised out of thin air and is crushing my airways.
Elien. Elien is the one who broke Lioran. But... why? From all I’ve gathered, he just up and left Lioran??
Why would he do that?
Ugh! I need to get to the bottom of this, but the only person who can give me these answers is Elien.
How do I get in touch with him, though?
He made his presence known a few minutes ago with Lioran. He also spoke through me that day on the field with Rhydian.... These two incidents, plus the first time I saw him in the lake, are the only times I’ve seen him.
How can I feel his guilt, his hurt, and emotions, but still not know how to reach him??
I need to understand his past with Lioran. My peace and maybe even safety are dependent on it... But how do I talk to Elien??
Do I jump in the lake again??